My testimony

Hello again.... I thought I would give a small testimony of my life as I begin this new journey. As many, I grew up having a knowledge of a man called Jesus. I went to VBS on occasion and Sunday school every now and then. As I grew into my teen years, still not having true knowledge of who Jesus was, my actions as a young man nothing to be proud of. Not my family, me, especially not God. I didn't know Him at the time so I wasn't too concerned. I became addicted to things of this world, alcohol and sex took over. And I continued down this dark path because I felt I could dig myself out all on my own. I left for the Marine Corps straight out of high school thinking that would help straighten me out. I attended church every Sunday while in boot camp. Listened at times. Being medically released shortly after graduation, I had straightened up I thought, but never gained a relationship with Jesus. In fact I had turned my back on the concept all together. There was one guy in my squad bay who told me everyday about Jesus, even when I didn't want to hear it. When I got home, naturally I plummeted back into my old ways. This went on for years. I grew into a depression, yet I kept it bottled up inside. At a church service when I was about 23, I broke out into a weeping mess. I realized Jesus was trying to save me. I went forward and was soon baptized. Like so many though, that fire dwindled and I later only claimed to be Christian while living like the world. Faking things on Sundays or when I would see a fellow church member at the store. It wasn't until I had been drug through the mud, and became angry with God, that He would get through to me. I prayed many nights to die before I woke so I would not have to face another day. Well, I'm still alive. God has a plan for me and wasn't going to let go even when I had let go of myself. He saw me through all those years of addictions and faking it, and placed me where I am today. I am so thankful that He is more faithful than me. I serve an awesome God, and I feel this is what He is calling me to do. I do not look like the typical Christian that most would suspect. Maybe I'm a little rough around the edges. But I feel I am a chosen instrument just like Saul, chosen to spread the Gospel to whomever I can reach.